Do You Know the Cookie Rules?

A friend sent this to me a few days ago, so I just had to share...if only I were this clever to think of all these rules!!

Christmas Cookie Rules:

1. If you eat a Christmas cookie fresh out of the oven, it has no calories because everyone knows that the first cookie is the test and thus calorie free.

2. If you drink a diet soda after eating your second cookie, it also has no calories because the diet soda cancels out the cookie calories.

3. If a friend comes over while you're making your Christmas cookies and needs to sample, you must sample with your friend. Because your friend's first cookie is calories free, (rule #1) yours is also. It would be rude to let your friend sample alone and, being the friend that you are, that makes your cookie calorie free.

4. Any cookie calories consumed while walking around will fall to your feet and eventually fall off as you move. This is due to gravity and the density of the caloric mass.

5. Any calories consumed during the frosting of the Christmas cookies will be used up because it takes many calories to lick excess frosting from a knife without cutting your tongue.

6. Cookies colored red or green have very few calories. Red ones have three and green ones have five - one calorie for each letter. Make more red ones!

7. Cookies eaten while watching "Miracle on 34th Street" have no calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel.

8. As always, cookie pieces contain no calories because the process of breaking causes calorie leakage.

9. Any cookies consumed from someone else's plate have no calories since the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling to their plate. We all know how calories like to CLING!

10. Any cookies consumed while feeling stressed have no calories because cookies used for medicinal purposes NEVER have calories. It's a rule!

So, go out and enjoy those Christmas Cookies - we only get them this time of year!

Merry Christmas & Happy New year

One Incredible Moment

If you have not discovered author Max Lucado, I simply cannot begin to explain how much you are missing. He is truly one of my favorite authors. Introducing him to my children brings me such joy. This is our second Christmas book we have begun reading aloud. I knew it would happen, but I certainly didn't think I would break in the very first chapter.

A massive, golf-sized lump stuck in the middle of my esophagus . . . and then the tears flowed. I finally finished that chapter and decided I had to share it with you all. I could tell you that you must buy this book, but unless I give you ample reason to, you probably won't. I'm typing out the entire chapter for you in hopes that it will stir your soul to purchase this book and read it to your children.

From One Father to Another


"This isn't the way I planned it God. Not at all. My child being born in a stable? This isn't the way I thought it would be. A cave with sheep and donkeys, hay and straw? My wife giving birth with only the stars to hear her pain?

This isn't at all what I imagined. No, I imagined family. I imagined grandmothers. I imagined neighbors clustered outside the door and friends standing at my side. I imagined the house erupting with the first cry of the infant. Slaps on the back. Loud laughter. Jubilation.

That's how I thought it would be...

But now...Who will celebrate with us? The sheep? The shepherds? The stars?

This doesn't seem right. What kind of husband am I? I provide no midwife to aid my wife. No bed to rest her back. Her pillow is a blanket from my donkey...

Did I miss something? Did I, God?

When you sent the angel and spoke of the son being born - this isn't what I pictured. I envisioned Jerusalem the temple, the priest and the people gathered to watch. A pageant perhaps. A parade...I mean, this is the Messiah!

Or, if not born in Jerusalem how about Nazareth? Wouldn't Nazareth have been better? At least there I have my house and my business. Our here, what do I have? A weary mule, a stack of firewood, a a pot of warm water. this is not the way I wanted is to be!....Forgive me for asking but...is this how God enters the world? The coming of the angel, I've accepted. The questions people asked about the pregnancy, I can tolerate. The trip to Bethlehem, fine. But why a birth in a stable, God?

Any minute now Mary will give birth. Not to a child, but to the Messiah. Not to an infant, but to God. That's what the angel said. That's what Mary believes. And God, my God, that's what I want to believe. But surely you can understand; it's not easy. It seems so...so...so...bizarre.

I'm unaccustomed to such strangeness, God. I'm a carpenter. I make things fit. I square off the edges. I follow the plumb line. I measure twice before I cut once. Surprises are not the friend of a builder. I like to know the plan. I like to see the plan before I begin.

But this time I'm not the builder, am I? This time I'm a tool. A hammer in your grip. A chisel in your hands. This project is yours not mine.

I guess it's foolish of me to question you. Forgive my struggling. Trust doesn't come easy to me, God. But you never said it would be easy, did you?

One final thing, Father. The angel you sent? Any chance you could send another? If not an angel, maybe a person? I don't know anyone around here and some company would be nice. Maybe the innkeeper or a traveler? Even a shepherd would do..."


Oh, how I love the way he writes!

Thanksgiving Blessings!

I know I'm REALLY late posting this but I just couldn't make the time to sit here and share! Even though I'm three weeks late, I still want to share what we did for Thanksgiving this year.

I am always trying to find new and creative things for us to do together as a family. Having an age span of 13 to 18, mixed with two of them being deaf, the interest and ability levels vary tremendously. From activities to games, books, movies and read alouds, it's a constant struggle that I will not give up on!

As we were having our traditional Thanksgiving lunch at Mimi's Cafe, I brought a notebook and explained a little game that I thought of that morning. Although this may seem very remedial to some and rather silly to do with an 18 year old boy, it proved to be a very memorable experience for us. Using the alphabet as our guide, we went around the table and had everyone tell us what they were thankful for that started with their assigned letter. We continued until we were at the end of the alphabet.

Now, what was so amusing was listening to every one's feedback after they heard what someone had picked for their letter. Shouts of 'how could you be thankful for egg salad when the elephants that God created are so amazing!' So, once we were finished, everyone wanted to do it again so they could give their answer to a letter they didn't get the first time. My cheeks were actually sore when we left from all the laughing and several times my husband kept trying to hush us up as the onlookers were really looking! My oldest informed me that he has given me plenty of blogging material in just one luncheon with the family :)

I realize that this list may mean nothing to you and it probably won't even make you giggle, but I'm posting it anyways because it's my blog and I want a written record of these items and this day!! (wow - that sounded really snotty but it sure was fun typing it - baaahaa!)


A: Adam and apples
B: Bananas and bats
C: Cochlear Implants :)
D: Dad and dogs
E: Egg salad and elephants
F: Flirting and Fords
G: God and Grandparents
H: Holy Spirit and hospitals
I: Ice cream and International Airports
J: Jesus and Joy
K: Kyle and Kitchen
L: Love, lakes and Lego Universe
M: Mom, mall and Monopoly
N: Nintendo and nachos
O Oven, onions and Oreos
P: Prayer and paper
Q: Questions and queens
R: Racing and restrooms
S: Shopping and Savior
T: Teaching and Model T's
U: Us, underwear, utters and uniqueness
V: Victoria, victory and vase
W: Water and WWW
X: Xmen!
Y: You and yellow
Z: Zipper and zebras

If you know my children, you can pretty much guess which child gave which answer!

My wishes are tardy, but I still hope you had an incredible Thanksgiving Day and that most of all...I hope you made memories!

Update on My Kids - Part 3

Sitting here with a smile on my face as I listen to a very intense but giggle-filled speech therapy session. This session is after hours and on a much personal level with pillows and blankets surrounding the participants. I happen to dearly love both parties involved. One is my precious daughter and the other is my dedicated husband.

Although I have no regrets - I mean completely, 100%, ZERO regrets, I certainly had no idea we would be treating my 15 year old daughter like a toddler and struggle as much as we have the past few months. I also had no clue that my son would soar past the expected goals only to be released from speech therapy three weeks after the first implant since he was already talking and hearing on the phone! A household full of mixed emotions is putting it quite mildly.

Honestly, I can't remember the last time I signed to Adam. His second implant surgery went even better than the first and activation was all it was meant to be. This child, so full of life, smiles even more now than he ever has (he has been known as the 'smiling boy' by many people!) He's confident, secure and engaging in conversations that he dared not even think about 5 months ago. After only 3 months of guitar lessons, he is being moved to the intermediate classes starting in January! I have also noticed an improvement in his reading skills as well as his sense of humor :)

Here is where the mixed emotions break into the scene.

Victoria is a different story. She struggled with the first surgery, implants and activation, while the second surgery was even worse. She had an adverse reaction to the anesthesia and threw up 8 times before we even got her home. Her equilibrium was massively affected, so she had trouble walking by herself and the dizziness lasted almost a week. Poor girl even got a 24 hour stomach bug in the middle of her recovery time! She finally turned the corner and made it to activation day. I will say that I was a little shocked to learn that we were starting all over again - just like the first implant. I fully expected her to be able to hear even better with two implants (and eventually she will). Instead, she stated that she 'feels' the sounds and really only hears beeps. Sheepishly, I sat and listened as our audiologist explained that you have two hemispheres to your brain so each side works independently when referring to auditory paths. I should have known that!

We have now been back twice for remapping (fine-tuning) and I can finally say that things are looking up (which is why I haven't blogged until now). She is still very timid around a group of girls since she can't understand everything they are saying, but I do believe that one day she will be able to have a complete conversation with a friend and never have to ask for repeated sentences.

The biggest hurdle is remaining consistent. Determination will pay off but the process is shattering to your patience bucket. Last
week I spent 7 minutes working with her on one word. It was tedious and patient-taxing. I know now that her brain can hear these sounds but they have no idea what they are since she's never heard them before. We have to re-train her brain to know what a "g" sounds like, etc. With that knowledge, I can't make excuses anymore, like in the past. I had to teach her what a soft c and m sound like and I wasn't giving up. We both finally broke into a giggle and I accepted her pronunciation of the word. 7 minutes was long enough.

We are still under directions to repeat every word or sentence three times before we resort to signing. In my determination to NOT sign, it took us 11 minutes the other day to go through dictation. It was two scriptures verses that Adam did in 3 minutes, but I kept having to repeat myself numerous times for Victoria. It was mentally draining but I was very proud of her since she never got upset or lost focus. I couldn't say that a month ago.

After explaining to Victoria that her success of these implants solely rests on her determination and effort, I have begun to see some changes. She is now asking what certain sounds are and is increasing the volume each day on her own. Just yesterday she was telling me about a friend and then stopped herself to ask if she was saying the name right. I spoke the name about 6 times until she had it perfect. I chuckled internally knowing that she finally crossed the threshold - she wants to have better speech, therefore, she will!

The speech therapy I spoke about in my opening sentence is something daddy asked us to do. Throughout the day, I write down any word that she has trouble speaking. I work with her for a while and then move on. The list then lands in daddy's hands for him to critique her sometime after dinner. I love listening to them - his persistence and her girly-ness! Not only does she get the chance to work on these words twice, but she gets to hear how they sound from a male voice as well as a female voice.

It's December 7th and winter is here in full throttle - 14 degrees when I awoke this morning. The leaves crunch under our feet, the garden lies empty and the flowers no longer bring a splash of color to my front entrance.

However, there's a massive contrast when you walk through my front door. In here, it's spring! Conversations are budding, patience is anew, smiles are blooming and there's a fresh spring in the step of two children who are experiencing what we take for granted everyday.

Sound

Not only am I thankful for an on-time God, but also for children with more perseverance than most people I know!

And these little babies...no longer don our household :)

Tomato Basil Fettuccine

Just tried this new recipe which was a huge hit for the fam! It came from the Taste of Home magazine, so I just knew it would be wonderful!Tomato Basil Fettuccine

8 ozs cooked fettuccine
1/4 cup chopped onion
1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon butter
1 can (14-1/2 ounces) diced tomatoes - undrained
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup evaporated milk
1/4 cup chopped fresh basil (or 1-2 tablespoons dried basil)
2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese

Saute onion and red pepper flakes in butter till onion is tender. Add tomatoes and salt; cook and stir over medium-high heat until most of the liquid has evaporated. Remove from the heat; let stand one minute. gradually whisk in milk. Drain cooked fettuccine and place in a large bowl. Add the basil, Parmesan cheese and tomato mixture; toss to coat. 4 servings.

The next day, I added some chopped up leftover chicken and a few tablespoons of milk which made an awesome meal along side my warm, home made wheat rolls!

Happy cooking :)

Thankful for My Heritage

I experienced something very odd a few weeks ago. Due to other events at home, we chose to attend the traditional first service at our church instead of the second service which is contemporary.

When I first walked in, I was shocked at the songs they were singing. I knew it was a traditional service but really wasn't expecting songs from my childhood.

'Blessed Assurance' along with 'Look What the Lord Has Done' and 'I Will Enter His Gates' were songs I sang as a preteen! I will have to admit that my initial thought was, "I cannot believe they are still singing these songs!" It only took a nano second for the Lord to convict me and remind me that I was saved on these songs. The words still ring true and with passion. Within minutes, I began worshipping with a lump in my throat as we sung 'You are Awesome in This Place' and 'Come Holy Spirit'. I only had Adam with me who looked rather perplexed at the style of music and the change in my behavior. I knew right then that Hymn 101 was a new class that would start in my home the next week!

I borrowed a hymn book from the church and then spent some time Monday morning explaining my heritage to the kids. I sang as I spoke and wept as I sang. For me, it was a moving moment that I wanted my kids to experience. We read the words to 'Amazing Grace', 'There is Power in the Blood', 'What a Day That Will Be' and 'How Great Thou Art'. Then I began sharing with them my limited knowledge of the historical background of the writers of these precious old hymns and their incredible journeys in life.

Fanny Crosby, blind from childhood, was inducted into the Gospel Music Hall of Fame in 1975 and is known as the "Queen of Gospel Song Writers. She was a rescue mission worker, poet, lyricist and composer with over 9000 songs in print as well as 1,000 poems. She was also an incredible public speaker, played the organ and gave piano lessons...let's not forget that she was blind!

That first service worship experience was so rewarding, that I decided to do it again. With both kids in hand, we greeted the predominately older folks and began to worship with them. While we sang 'In The Presence of Jehovah', I could hear my mom harmonizing with me in my mind. Oh, what powerful words 'He is Here, You Can Touch Him' possess!

I was so blessed and elated when a message in tongues was given. Paraphrased..."I am here now with you to bless you. I will give you My strength. I am yours and your are Mine. Together we are victorious."

Amen!! I accept that, Lord! I'll take Your blessings AND the victories!

I don't feel it or say it enough, but I am extremely grateful for my Christian heritage. I enjoy the contemporary services as much as anyone else, but I treasure the hymns - they made me who I am. They shaped my hope and strengthened my faith. Thank you, mom and dad, for the Godly heritage you gave me!

Update on My Kids - Part 2

"In the midst of her trials, she has found strength she never knew she had and an appreciation for life unlike anything she has ever known. As a consequence, she is joyously alive, howbeit, in the face of great adversity."

I love to read. Period. You name it, I want to read it. It inspires me. Encourages me. Raises me to new levels that I didn't know existed. God's Word, other blogs, books, Internet articles, quotes, devotions, online sermons, etc., etc.

I read the above quote somewhere and copied it onto my virtual notepad. I want this to be me. I want people to be able to say that about me one day...

"...this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead" 2 Corinthians 1:9.

A dear friend of mine recently shared with me Rick Warren's personal observations since dealing with his wife's cancer. He said that he used to think that life was a series of hills and valleys. "There were good and bad times that ebbed and flowed. Now he sees life more like a railroad track. Two parallel lines - one side being good things and the other being the challenges. At every stage in our life we have things that are wonderful and we consider them blessings. At the same time, we are facing challenges and struggles that God is using to shape us into the people who will spend eternity with Him. We have to remember that everything we are doing now is only practice for the "REAL" life we have yet to live."

Wow - I love the parallelism to this analogy!

After my first update on the kids, I started receiving these precious emails ... "I pray that they acknowledges their struggles and successes, all at the same time."

"We declared Victoria to be "Victoria the victorious" in our prayers this morning! I am asking the Father to give her a vision for where He is taking her."

"I'm sure this is a roller coaster ride for you. Thank you so much for sharing and being an inspiration for those of us who are just struggling with the small stuff. The boys tell me that Adam is an amazing guitar player and I know they are blessed and encouraged by his example."

"We are in God's throne room daily, lifting your kids up."

I am so thankful for the phone calls, encouraging emails and reassuring comments. I read them to my kids and watch the spark in their eyes light up.

So how are they doing a week after my first update? Amazing to say the least! I have purposely waited a week to write this second update so I could report their success after another mapping session on Thursday.

* I call Adam on the phone often and rarely ever sign. I sat in the hallway this week in guitar lessons for the first time. I do believe the proverbial umbilical cord has been severed!!

* Victoria is now getting annoyed by my keyboard clicking, soft background music at the Chiropractor and the beeps on my phone when I'm texting! Although she is irritated, I can't help but laugh. Why? Because she can hear them :) I keep reminding her that her brain will eventually tune out the noises that are not necessary to function - just like it happened with her heartbeat.

Ironically, when I asked her last week if she still hears her heartbeat, she looked very puzzled and wanted to know what I was talking about. Flabbergasted, I explained the whole scenario. She had no idea what I was talking about and says she hears nothing!! Not only has she tuned out the beating sound, but also the entire event!

* They both received an excellent report from the audiologist and the surgeon as we prepare for surgery number two.

* When we left the appointment yesterday, I stepped on a bunch of leaves and heard them crunch. I stopped, made the kids freeze and stepped on them again asking if they heard that. They both did!! Victoria had a strange look in her eyes and then the dimple appeared - I heard leaves crunching!!

* I was very encouraged yesterday when our precious audiologist stated that she was very proud of both the kids and that Victoria is already doing better than she ever anticipated - woohoo!


I have to share one more funny thing. I was going over the next surgery date and the proceeding appointments with them both yesterday. The surgery is on Tuesday, so Victoria asked what time on Thursday do we go to the audiologist to have the implant activated. Thursday? "No, honey, remember, we have to wait three weeks for the incision to heal before it can be turned on."

I was completely amazed as she sat there trying to tell me that it wasn't like that with the first implant - she has completely forgotten! In case I haven't shared this yet, that was the one thing that I was so upset about. I just knew that the three week waiting period with ZERO hearing for my kids was going to be horrendous. Trust me when I say that it was certainly difficult, but four weeks later and my kids don't even remember - they think they got activated two days later! God is so funny :) Good thing I'm journaling this whole event or they wouldn't remember a thing a year from now!

Although we're nearing the finish line, please but don't stop praying -- their second surgery is scheduled for Tuesday, November 8 at 7 and 10 am.Count your blessings, name them one, two, three!

Update on My Kids - Part 1

Warning...this is a long blog!

I am sorry that it's taken me a few weeks to write an update on the kids and their first Cochlear Implant, but there is actually great reason for this.

This uncharted road we have been traveling on since September 20th has been physically, mentally and spiritually exhausting, bewildering and stressful. The emotional roller-coaster ride has been insane. Honestly, the last thing I wanted to do was rehash the struggles and be reminded of the tediously slow process we are experiencing.

However, my spirit has been lifted the last few days as I have seen definite improvements in my kids progress as well as their demeanor.

If you remember from my previous blog, activation day was less than exciting for my kiddos. It was not what we or the kids anticipated or ever dreamed of. Not only was it not video worthy, we were looking to get our money back!

And then 24 hours passed.

You would never have convinced me that in just 24 short hours, we would do a complete turn-about and cry with joy instead of weeping from anger and frustration. But that is exactly what happened. Both kids went to the mapping session (fine-tuning) with positive attitudes and great expectations. Even in Victoria's timid state, she did incredibly well. Adam was off the charts with his ability to process sounds in just one day! I was even more flabbergasted when the sound field testing came back at 15 db - I would never have believed it had I not been sitting in the back corner of the sound proof room! I, personally, have a mild hearing loss of 20-25 db, so that means my kids were hearing sounds that I could not hear! Even though these were just sounds and not actual words, my husband and I were still elated!

A week later we embraced yet another three hour mapping appointment where they were reprogrammed (I guess I have little robots in my house now!) and boosted in the volume arena. Victoria's progress is a tad slower than Adam's, so she left with her level on 4 while Adam had his on 6. However, a week later, they were both at 10 -- right where the audiologist wanted them!

Then the speech therapy and listening drills began - at home and at the center. We are listening to 1st and 2nd grade books on tape trying to get their brain retrained and to really focus on listening. We try to name every sound as it happens in the house and draw attention to noises we think they have missed. The hardest part? Repeating ourselves three times before we are allowed to resort to signing. I've signed for 14 years now - I can't believe I'm having to slap my own hands and try to not sign!

So, here is the individual update:

Since Adam's hearing was better than Victoria's for 10 years, his threshold is wider as is his tolerance. He has heard sounds and pitches more clearly and in a different range than she ever has. Which is why he is doing better with the implant than Victoria. He loves it, has embraced it and can't wait for the next surgery on the other ear.

Up until the last year when Adam's hearing plummeted, Victoria had the greater loss. Lower threshold; lower tolerance. She does not relish or accept new challenges with the tenacity that Adam does. She is struggling with being a baby listener. Too many things to listen to and it literally hurts her head. Unfortunately, she has taken the implant off often in the past two weeks. As strange as it is, Victoria hears her heartbeat every evening when we take the implant off. It scared her at first, wondering what the pounding noise was and then it was just plain irritating. We have since found out that this is quite normal and will hopefully fade away as time goes on. Victoria is quite apprehensive about the second surgery.

The surgeon told us that, "Listening is truly an art and very difficult to do. These kids are having to start all over with the patience and tolerance of a teenager instead of a baby." We will get there but it's a much slower process than we ever imagined.

Ok - I said it and I didn't cry! This is what I didn't want to share. These are our struggles and the facts of life for us. However, now it's time to move forward and catch you all up to speed. Enough with the whining - I'm ready to share the honey-sweet good reports!

Yesterday, I read a chapter to the kids while sitting on Victoria's lap. Adam was about 2 feet away and understood every word I said without me signing (that has NEVER happened)! I was sitting on Victoria's lap so that I could point to every word and have her follow along. It was tedious for her but we are doing everything we can to NOT sign. She got it, but it was hard. I keep having to remind her - you have to work at this. It will not come easy, but it will happen.

They are both hearing sounds and/or noises that they've never heard before. Although Victoria is doing a lot of lip reading, my signing has still decreased by at least 50%.

They heard the dryer shut off today.

Victoria heard me sneeze in my room while she was in the kitchen (quite a distance away) and wanted to know what the noise was.

In Adam's guitar lesson this week, I only had to sign ONE sentence! Also, he was moved to the back row so that newer, beginning kids could be in the front (since that means the instructor doesn't have to watch him as closely, that's a compliment!) Adam has only been taking lessons since August, so I'm very proud of him! We have decided that I will be sitting in the hallway next week - we're both ready to cut the proverbial umbilical cord :)

Victoria's speech therapist hugged her and got misty-eyed at her progress last week.

At therapy, Adam talked on the phone while the therapist was in the hallway and heard every sentence she said! Only two more sessions with Adam and he will be dismissed from therapy!

In only two short weeks, they have both done an amazing job of learning how to block out all the loud background noises and focus on the person speaking.

Victoria no longer hears her heartbeat when the implant is off - her brain has learned to just ignore it. When I asked her about it last night, she looked puzzled and had to think about it. "I don't hear anything without my implant - what are you talking about?"
I just had to laugh - she had already forgotten that only last week it was driving her crazy!

I taught science class at co-op this week and Adam understood nearly everything I said.

It dawned on me yesterday that Victoria has not said that everyone is too loud for almost a week!

Even better news...she has not taken off her implant once!

They both went to youth on Wednesday without me - first time in years. I knew Adam would understand almost everything so I asked Victoria what she wanted me to do, since I'm not supposed to be signing. She told me not to come. "I'll be fine. I'll listen as best as I can and try to read his lips." She didn't understand much at all - BUT, at least she tried. That's a huge milestone for her.

The last two weeks, Victoria had embraced her insecurities and somewhat retreated. These past few days, I saw a butterfly emerging. She is strong - she is a Flint!

Adam is bold, outgoing, outspoken and very sure of himself. These character traits have served him well these past few weeks.

I warned you this was going to be a long blog :)

Bottom line...I'm very proud of them both and although the past three weeks have been challenging, I have no regrets. God has been our constant source of strength and comfort. We are trying to seize each moment and to live every hour to the very fullest.

I must sign off for now. In the Update, Part 2 (hopefully this weekend) I want to share what the Lord reminded me of and some special words of encouragement from my friends.

Blessings to you all!

Behind the Appearances

I love this story so much that I just had to copy and post it here:


"I like to cook and fix meals for my husband. Since I was a child I liked to watch my mom preparing meals for us, and enjoyed eating her food. Growing up I didn't do a lot of cooking, but in college I had no other choice, but to start cooking myself. I did, and I enjoyed so much that I started cooking for all my friends. It is such a good feeling when you offer somebody something you cooked with love, and they like it.

One day while preparing the ingredients for a meal, I was fascinated by these extra large potatoes. They seemed so healthy and you would not think for a minute that there might be something wrong with them. I started to peel them, they seem OK, but when I got to the middle of potatoes and they were brown. There were no signs on the outside to warn you that they were rotten inside.

I had to go deeper to remove the bad part and two things came to mind while removing the rotten part. One had to do with my own life and the other with the appearance of human being in general. I felt like God was telling me:” This is how much I had to remove from you; I had to cut deeper, though painful, to remove the filth in your life! I started crying, while recalling some of the painful moments in my life!

Many people live their lives as if they would have it all together, but inside they have a lot of depression, anxiety, hurt, and pain. It seems like we delight in showing off what we don’t have, and like to make people think that everything is just fine with us. God knows us so well, and still loves us and accepts us. Why then, are we afraid to be transparent?

I know one thing that can help us is examining our lives, confessing what is not right and leave it behind. I often heard people trying to excuse bad behaviors instead of dealing with the situation and do something about it. I admit that I struggle with anger, and there is no excuse about it. I need to deal with the issue and solve it. I can't take a pair of scissors, cut out the pages of my Bible that speak about anger, and pretend they are not there. None of us is perfect, but this should determine us not to remain at the same level of growth. By admitting our imperfections and allowing God to change us, we are changing and growing.

I think we can learn some lessons for life even from a rotten potato. Which brings my thoughts to a movie I've seen “Faith Like Potatoes”! An awesome movie that inspired me to have a real faith in spite of what the society or the circumstances tell me. Faith just like a potato, real and touchable."

Eureka!

Surprises at every corner does not even begin to describe our day today.

With a spring in our step, we all marched out the door this morning in great anticipation of what awaited us in the "activation room!"

All of the professionals tried desperately to warn us that they will not hear right away. "It's a slow process." "Their brain will not be able to handle all the sounds right away." "90% of implant patients hate them for the first two weeks."

I explained this to the kids numerous times and then tried to set my own expectation bar very low.

I was unsuccessful in doing this.

I did not expect my daughter to start crying when she heard the first beeping sounds. They were not glassy eyes full of joyfulness but salt water from fear and nervous anticipation. There was no amazing video to show of their first experience hearing our voices. They couldn't hear our voices. It was a little disturbing to hear them both say, "I don't hear anything, but I feel it." They could not make out a single word. Adam's expression was very bewildering - " The sounds are stinging my brain."

The audiologist explained that this was all normal and that their brain actually has to be re-trained. There is mapping that happens on the computer with the implants and mapping that occurs in their brain while they are listening. They really did "hear" but their brain had no idea that these noises were sounds that form words. I know - it sounds crazy! Our heads were spinning as we were trying to swallow these alienated explanations.

Then the speech therapist proved her point. She turned off the vibration mode on her cell phone and set it on the table. When the phone rang, Victoria said she felt it. She was wrong - there was nothing to feel! She heard it but didn't really know she was hearing it! Her brain didn't know it was a phone ringing since she's never heard a phone ring before!

This is where extensive speech therapy and preschool-like games at home come into play. We literally have to treat them like a toddler naming every sound we hear. We've been cautioned against signing so that they can begin to depend on the implants ability to let them hear. Baby listeners they are called! As a friend of mine told me today, "Sometimes you have to work before the blessings come."

So here we are...

Trusting yet nervous

Excited but skeptical

Confused though at peace

Frustrated yet joyful

Believing but doubtful

Can you really feel all of these emotions at the same time with the same event? All I can say is that we did.

So, we have a choice. My husband and I have decided to accept and trust God and then proclaim His incredible blessings. We will NOT confess any negative thoughts or let them take a foothold in our hearts.

So, that is what I put on Facebook - they DO work and I AM thankful for this incredible technology. I must believe that this truly is a tediously slow process and that with time it will get better.

In case you're wondering, this is why I blog. It is my journal. It is how I expressive myself. I truly write just for me. If I happen to have readers, then that is just an extra bonus! I usually open up my heart and let the rawness show. I don't pull any punches and I don't pretend to have it all together. I try not to portray that every trial in my life is a welcoming avenue for character building! However, I do pray that it is :)

I also blog so that I can see where the Lord has brought my family and I. As I did recently, I like to reread some old blogs and chuckle at where I was not so long ago. I love to reminense about a certain event that seemed so catastrophic at the moment yet a minor anthill now!

I am positive that I will look back on this blog 6-12 months from now and not only stand in completely awe of what the Lord has done for my children but also see that what was so perplexing and heart breaking at that time, can bring a joyful smile to my face now.

And The Ears Will Hear!

13 years after our research began, the day has finally come...

Each child has their "suitcase" ready at the front door - it is packed full of adaptors, gadgets, electronic devices, processors, drying units and things I don't even know how to name!Their hair has already grown back quite a bit from the surgery. Is it truly possible that it was just three weeks ago when that tedious and painful day willingingly struck both my children? Time...steady yet uncontrollable.

These strong offspring of mine are phycially and mentally prepared. They understand that they will only begin to hear a little after todays 4-hour appointment. Then a little more on Thursdays 3-hour appointment while the rest of the 22 electrodes are paired up next Tuesday. Our kids, who have "heard" at a 90-110 db loss will actually hear at a 20-30 db loss in just a few short days.

I am in awe even as I type this.

My mind is on overload.

I had trouble living in the real world yesterday. I kept day-dreaming. Complete lack of focus. What now? Will I have to continue to sign? Will they truly be able to have a normal conversation and not shake their heads and smile having no idea what the person actually said? This has been our world for so long, that I really cannot fathom a different way. Only God knows...

I honestly cannot wrap my fingers around the possibilites that are now within arms reach.

For such a time as this....Allen and I have to believe that God, in His infinite wisdom, planned for October 12, 2011. He's not late or too early. I personally believe He is indeed an on-time God! He has ordained our steps and ordered our days!

On the way home from guitar lessons yesterday, Adam was beyond excitement about today's possibilites. He asked me when the next surgery date was for the other ear and why it was so far out from the first surgery. When I explained that the stitches had to heal and then we needed to see what kind of success we will have with this implant before we fully committ to the second surgery, he was flabbergasted! He shouted, "What are you talking about? Of course we're going to have success - 100% success! This will work, mom - I will hear tomorrow!"Out of the mouth of babes... :)

Can You Trust Him?

This was from my Jesus Calling devotional book the other day. Just too good - it has to be for more people than just me!


"When many things seem to be going wrong, trust Me. When your life feels increasingly out of control, thank Me. These are supernatural responses and they can lift you above your circumstances. If you do what comes naturally in the face of difficulties, you may fall prey to negativism. Even a few complaints can set you on a path that is a downward spiral, by darkening your perspective and mind-set. With this attitude controlling, you, complaints flow more and more readily from your mouth. Each one moves you steadily down the slippery spiral. The lower you go, the faster you slide; but it is still possible to apply brakes. Cry out to Me in My Name! Affirm your trust in Me, regardless of how you feel. Thank Me for everything, though this seems unnatural - even irrational. Gradually you will begin to ascend, recovering your lost ground.

When you are back on ground level, you can face your circumstances from a humble perspective. If you choose supernatural responses this time - trusting and thanking Me - you will experience My unfathomable Peace."

But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. Psalm 13:5

Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Ephesians 5:20

Are You Addicted to Speed?

Have you noticed how persistent God can be? If He doesn't get through with one avenue, He will try another. I have been hit over the head with a spiritual 2 x 4 before and I really feel that it's happening again. But not just to me. It think it's a world-wide ordeal.

I believe God is trying to get our attention and what He has to say is not new or earth shattering but necessary to hear. I will sum it up in one word.

REST.

It is talked about everywhere. Especially the last two weeks. In Sunday School, we've been talking about honoring the Sabbath and finding time to rest and enjoy your family. Then I see it on a few Facebook statuses - people that aren't in my SS class. Joyce Meyer begins tweeting about resting. Richard Exley emails me a daily devotion and every day for a week, it's been about keeping the Sabbath holy and relaxing. Ann Voskamp has blogged about it three days this week. I'm listening to Cast of Characters audio CD's by Max Lucado and right there in Chapter 2, he slips in how our body needs rest and how crucial family time is.

I don't think we're referring to just some quite time or going to bed early one day a week. I think it's more than that.

I believe we need a life-style change . . . a make-over within our own home.

We finally got the message in our household. I knew I bit off more than I could chew this school year, but didn't' really know how to back out of anything. We only allow our kids to play one sport, but Adam's team called for two practices a week - during the time that I was supposed to be with Victoria at her cheer practice. Then I enrolled in two different co-ops. I know....crazy. But they are both SO beneficial for my kids that I couldn't bear pulling them from either one. And I volunteered to be the treasurer for the Edmond Home School support group. Let's not forget about church three times a week...and, and, the list goes on....

We do rest on Sundays. I do have my morning devotions with the Lord. I strive to take a 20 minute nap almost every weekday and I am in bed before 10:30 pm. But I was still leg-high with barely anytime for recovery or evening family time.

Then my kids had implant surgery and my life completely changed. Adam can't play soccer now - no contact sports. All field trips - cancelled. No school for 4 days while they recuperated. Not exactly how I would suggest you free up some time in your life, but it happens to be our family story. And for that, I am very thankful. It was just enough so that we can now breathe. And God knew that. Our evenings are relaxed now. The board games have come back out and we only leave two nights a week - church and cheer. Whew!

An epidemic. That's what I think is happening. We live in a fast-paced technology-driven, wait-for-no-one society. And it's killing us. We desperately need to catch God's vision for resting - giving our body the break it needs. If we do not take breaks, we will break.

Ann Voskamp is so eloquent with her words. Here is an excerpt from her blog from a few days ago:

"Is there such a thing as a sustainable economy of the soul in this industrial world addicted to speed?...If we refuse Sabbaths of idleness, we construct our own idols. If we refuse rest and think of our work more important to Him than our rest in Him, we make our calling into the golden calf. In the digital era we have lost all sense of seasons. All sense of day and night and on and off and fertility and furlough and idol and God. We wind the world, our bodies, tight and let go and expect to be in motion forever, spun, us watchmakers of our own."

We have to believe that sleep is a daily reminder from God that we are NOT God. In His wisdom, He has ordained these seasons of rest for us to remember who we are . . . the dependent ones.

Another blog stated: "Funny how resting is a discipline for most people, when it should be a welcome relief! If we do not rest, we make ourselves cheap martyrs, victimized by no one but ourselves to our busyness and whirlwind lives."

Resting to you can mean just a break during the day to reflect on anything or nothing. But we also need an entire day set aside to let our bodies rejuvenate.

I was going over all this with my kids last night and looking up scripture verses. Psalms 127:2 says, "...He blessed His beloved with sleep." Did you ever stop to think about God resting on the 7th day? Why did He rest? I mean, seriously, it wasn't because He was tired! It was because He was satisfied. "He saw that it was good and He rested." He did so as an example to us - to show us how life needs to be handled. We are humans, not robots.

A friend once said that she finds herself praying to God more and more to please, give her rest. But I wonder if it's really up to us. Honestly, He gives us ample opportunity for rest, but it's up to us to recognize it and use it wisely.

Ironically, my devotional book "Jesus Calling" posted this scripture verse for the month of October: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

Richard Exley's daily devotion yesterday said, "Without the Sabbath, without rest and renewal, we would never have the inner resources to embrace a hurting world. In our weariness we would be tempted to resent the needy with their ever-present claims on us, but renewed by a Sabbath of rest we can embrace them with the love of Christ. Rather than isolating us, the Sabbath restores our spiritual and emotional vitality so we can return to our mission with renewed vision.

Oh, Lord Jesus, restore our souls so we can minister to others. Instead of feeling guilt during the refreshing season, help us learn to embrace the refreshing, resting times.

I honesty just don't see how all these people can be wrong - all at the same time. I think we need to stand alert and pay attention!

So, what will it take for you? Are you ready for some balance in your life? Are you willing to stop the Merry-Go-Round and do what God commands us? If you continue living like this, will you have any regrets two or three years down the road? Are you often sick because your body isn't getting the rest it needs? Will your kids remember that you were always "busy" and never had time to share a movie or play a game with them?

I leave you with these thought-provoking questions. Ultimately, the choice is yours.

Time to end this lengthy blog...after all, my Sunday afternoon nap awaits me :)

Under the Knife

I'm sure I'm not alone when I say that I'm not particularly found of hospitals. I'm thankful for them but really have no desire to utilize their services! I also think it is the general consensus that any type of surgery is scary - the unknown, the risks. But when it is your KIDS going under the knife, then the emotions rise to a new level.

Was I emotionally ready for such a day? Did I really understand the complexity of this surgery and the recovery process...times two?

Did I have my spiritual armor on and was I in submission to the Lord's will as He hovered over my children when I was forbidden to enter?

I really thought I would completely fall apart last Tuesday when both my kids were scheduled for cochlear implant surgery. I was anxiously dreading the moment they unlocked the bed and pushed my child into an area that was restricted to my presence. And then something pleasantly welcoming happened. Without shedding a tear, my husband and I embraced and turned away to divert our attention to the next child getting prepped for an IV. It was actually rather strange. No concern. No worry. Not even a second look. It was as if we left them in perfectly capable hands. And we did. Successful doctors and their Heavenly Father. At one point when I crashed on the couch while one was in surgery and the other was in recovery, I had a dream that Jesus was standing over my kids - just smiling at them.

The surgery? 100% successful with zero complications. The doctor said it couldn't have went better or smoother. Statements you always want to hear concerning any procedure involving a knife and anesthesia! The kids had a few rough days that followed, but I think the recovery process went very well with great progress each day.

We thank you for your devoted prayers - we felt them. They are real. The peace we experienced was amazing and I know it was only because of the prayer warriors going to battle for us. Here are some pictures to bring some reality to the process and your prayers! (I left the "detailed" pictures out!)

They wanted to be very clear which ear was being implanted!Both kids did great with their first IV!So thankful for Pastor Bob and our awesome friends who joined us in prayer!One last kiss from daddy....You can see the implant and the curly wire that wraps into the cochleaLooking and feeling great! This is the next day (can you believe it?)They are moments away from getting the head bandages cut off.

Two more weeks until activation. We are blessed and extremely exciting!!

Thank you Jesus!!

I Hate The Day Before

I never really thought this day would embark on my household.

We were totally against this happening 13 years ago but always said that when the time came and the children could make the decision on their own, then we would re-evaluate.

All too soon, the time came. The re-evaluation happened. The children are older, so the research began all over again. A million questions with hopes of having a million answers. Someone put us at ease...please.

We wrestled. We questioned God. We fought the tears. We prayed for healing. Then we let the flood gates open. They don't stop for days. Is this the right choice? Their healing never came.

Their healing never came.

We just wanted our kids to hear - to know what an "f, s or z" sounds like. To hear the birds awaken them with their incredible songs. To hear a dangerous car coming when they are on their bike. To hold a normal conversation with a friend.

If you remember from some of my previous posts, my son, Adam, has a digresive hearing loss. This past March, it plummeted again to the point that he was receiving very little, if any, benefit from his hearing aids. Standing at the fork in the road, we asked Adam what he wanted to do. If he still wanted to hear, then the only viable option was a Cochlear Implant.

State-of-the-art equipment which would give my kids back 80% of their hearing. Maybe this was the way the "healing" was going to come. After all, His ways are not our ways and I have to trust Him completely without ever looking back.

I only need a mustard seed....

I had to take three naps today. Woke up in a grumpy mood with my gut and head hurting. I'm sure most of it was emotionally driven. Not surprisingly, I had to apologize to the kids for my attitude. I just don't want tomorrow to come. I do but I don't. I would rather a Touch from the Masters Hand.

It wasn't until 4:00 pm that I was able to function without pain and a smile on my face. Forgive me, Lord, I know I need to trust You more. Please understand that I'll need an extra dose of that Grace You hand out when they wheel my child away from me tomorrow. The waiting room is such a hard place to be - physically and spiritually.

For now, I rest in His Sovereignty that He is in control and Lord of our lives. I anxiously await the activation session in three weeks to "see" what my kids will hear.As you know, ice cream always makes everything better, so we met Kyle at Braums tonight with our conversation wheel to share some laughter - and a few tears. Since they can't have anything to eat past midnight tonight we wanted the last thing in their mouths to be sweet - just like the mercy and grace of our Lord.

Thank you all for holding our children up in prayer all these years. I covet your prayers tomorrow at 7:30 am as we turn our babies over to a very capable doctor and the Master Healer.

Making Every Day Count

I know what we should be doing and I know how to do it. Finding the energy and time is another story...

Family Time

I can say that I think this task was much easier to accomplish when the kids were younger. We colored together, made crafts, played hide-n-seek, enjoyed board games, went on bike rides, ate together, etc. Now that they are older, I am shocked as to how difficult this feat is.

My 18 year old who is in college full time with a part time job is only home two nights a week for dinner . My daughter now has a part time job and cheer practice once a week. My youngest has soccer twice a week and of course, church two nights a week. Because of their age differences, our board games are limited as well as our movies. Adam's leg muscle issues makes the family bike riding extremely difficult. And of course, they have out grown coloring together and making crafts!

We have been forced to be very creative with our family time and activities. Since the quality time together seems to be scarce, we have to really make each day count ... to seize the moment!

That's when the wheel made it into our lives.Just a simple, little cardboard wheel created by Focus on the Family to aid families with conversation starters. We absolutely love it! We set aside at least one day a week to have a real, sit-down, family meal and then the wheel makes its appearance. It really blessed my heart when my 18 year old said that Tuesday was his favorite day - he looked forward to the home cooked meal and the intriguing conversations that would follow.

Here are a few of the questions or starters that we have enjoyed so far:

What is your favorite thing about being a child/parent/husband/wife?

If you could ask God one question, what would it be?

What three words describe your day today?

If you had one super power, what would it be?

If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

What are your favorite qualities about your mom, dad, sister or brother?

When do you feel brave?

What is the nicest thing anyone has ever done to you?

Tell about a time when you were scared and what did you do?

Some of these questions were answered within 10-15 minutes. I can remember one night when we realized it was almost 8 pm - we had donned the family table for two hours!!

Family time around the dinner table is certainly not over rated. If you have children, it just must be a priority. The old adage is so true - it's the quality not quantity of time that matters. I can honestly say that I have gotten to know my children better after listening to their answers - sometimes through tears and sometimes through laughter.

The older they get, the shorter the time with them seems to be. I just can't let it slip through my fingers...there's still so much more to teach them but even more importantly than that - there's still so much more listening for us parents to do. Kids really do have some good insight ... if we will just listen.

Camp Cavett...Where the Fun Begins!

I am shocked that it has been TWO months since my last blog and oh, how I have missed writing! I can't even begin to explain what my life has been like since June, so I won't even try! Instead, I'm going to try and get back on track and start with some long overdue pictures from Victoria's first camp and her Friends Crowning ceremony. She had an incredible time at camp with no issues and wasn't even ready to come home after 5 days! She made several new friends and grew up about 2 years in just the short 5 days!Climbing the inflatable "mountain" in the middle of the lake!

Relaxing at beautiful Lake Texoma!

You had to dress up as a fruit or vegetable for one of the nights - Victoria and her friend Anna are two peas in a pod!

This is right before the ceremony - since there wasn't a purple dress to be found in ANY store, we found this beautiful, light lavender formal at a consignment sale for ONE DOLLAR!!

And here is our little princess - an Honor Friends. We are so very proud of her!

Thanks for letting me share and boast! Time for my workout now and I promise to be back before December :)

She's Not So Little Anymore

She still sits on my lap...every morning she crawls out of bed

She still wants me to put her to bed and have Chocolate Cake time (one-on-one with mommy only!)

She still asks me to sit and color with her

We make crafts together and she loves for me to read to her

I am actually quite surprised by the list I just typed! You would think that I was talking about my 7 or 8 year old daughter. But alas, my "little" girl is only a few months shy of tuning 15!So what monumental event took place today that finally gave me the need and time to sit and blog about it?

I knew you would ask!

At 7:30 this morning, I dropped my precious daughter off to her first camp - ever! And yes...I teared up :(

I am excited for her as I know this will be an incredible opportunity. She is going with her best friend, who is also profoundly deaf, to Camp Cavett. Their motto is "The illness or disability does not define the child." This camp is completely sponsored by the OU Medical Center at no charge to the campers and is only for those children who have an illness or disability. Here is their website if you would like to learn more:

http://www.cavettkidsfoundation.org/node/11

Five days...three hours away....no one to share my clothes with...I'll probably be okay till around Friday morning and then I'm pretty sure I'll have a small mental breakdown!

She's in the Lord's hands and although I trust Him explicitly with her life, I still would like to know how in the world she managed to get to 14 years old so quickly :)

It's Almost JULY Already??

This has been an unbelievable summer - It's almost JULY?? Where in the world has it gone??

Well, let's see....ballet classes, tap practices, Farmer's Market booths, helping my daughter start her new business, audiologist appointments, Ranch Camp, home schooling meetings, new co-op meetings, essential oils meetings, garage sales, spring cleaning, shopping for a new RV, purging books and school curriculum, still schooling with math and reading, massively couponing to help lower-income families, helping my daughter babysit, blah, blah, blah!!

Sometimes I feel like a dog chasing my tail! I want to blog - everyday - yet I haven't for over two weeks! I told my husband just yesterday that so far this summer has been more hectic and challenging than a normal school year :(

So, here it is....the shortest blog I'll probably ever write.

That's all I wanted to say. It was really nothing earth shattering - that takes me hours to write! I just wanted to know if I remembered my password and could actually log on correctly and write something.

I did.

And now it's church time :)

Love you all!!

The Morning After

"I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little." Philippians 4:11-12

After a long hug from my soul-mate we just softly smile at each other. No words are exchanged. They simply are not needed. We enjoyed the comforts of a warm spaghetti dinner and actually shared some laughs over America's Got Talent!

While the kids ran off to shower and wind down for the evening, I brought him into the office and read him my blog. It is something special that I do for my husband. When he doesn't have his reading glasses, he can barely read anything. However, even when he does have them, he still asks me to read - he says he enjoys my voice :)

Sadly, this is one time that I just wanted him to read the words on the screen while I walked away. Instead, he pulls up a chair and gives me the floor. Of course, I don't even make it through the first paragraph. I've had several people tell me in the past that my blogs make them cry. I apologize but tell them that's because I cry when I write them!

As hard as it is, there is incredible comfort in duet-crying; especially when it is your husband.

The morning after is always full of a variety of emotions. The morning after you get married is just unexplainable - you are ecstatic with glee! The morning after you return home from a long vacation is tiring but rewarding; there truly is no place like home. The morning after you bury your second brother leaving you as an only child is a dreadful, atrocious, empty feeling.

Today, I have mixed feelings as well. Even though I screamed and cried in the shower, I have a smile on my face and hope in my steps. My son is refreshed and ready to deal with his basket of lemons. As soon as the kids wake up, they come find me and sit on my lap while we hug and rock for a minute or so. It's tradition and apparently they still enjoy it since they come to me! I will say that it's a little awkward trying to hold, hug and rock my daughter who is bigger and taller than me in every aspect! Sometimes she just slides off and falls to the ground laughing!

Adam found me on the computer this morning and sat down for his morning cuddle time. After only a few seconds, he lifted his head from my shoulder and asked, "Are you okay, momma?" He has such a precious, intuitive spirit.

And the answer?

Yes.

I am okay. Although I am not looking forward to the events that lie ahead of us, I am exciting to see what good things the Lord will bring about and what surprising doors He will open!

One of our favorite scripture verses for our household is Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

There you have it. It's already settled. HE is in control - not me. He actually loves my children more than I do! Do I think I can do a better job than He? Do I think I know better? Can I make the wisest decisions for my children outside of God's council? No, no and no!

They are yours, Lord, and I trust you explicitly with their lives.

As I am learning from Ann Voskamp...thanksgiving is the evidence of our acceptance of whatever He gives.

I Still Trust You

My day actually started out glorious - not even an inkling of worry in the air. Enjoyed my 6 a.m. run with an awesome friend, hit four stores before 9 a.m. to grab my freebies, got caught up on some chores and then spent a few hours shopping with my daughter before I had to pick up my youngest from a friends house for an appointment he had.

That's when it happened. One of the worst days I have had in a while. A day that I don't want to repeat.

Ever. The sad part is...I have.

Three times before.

I've experienced the sweeping of this mental tornado too many times already. There is just nothing like your heart aching for your children.

It's my baby boy. The one who was born with a moderate to severe hearing loss but now has a profound loss in both ears. Although he just received new hearing aids in December, about 3 weeks ago, things began to change again. He just wasn't hearing right. He had to be right in front of you before he could understand your words. We blamed his allergies and all the drainage. I cleaned the molds - more than once. I cleaned his ears - every 4-5 days. Then the realization became apparent. His hearing just plummeted again.

These are one of those times when I wish I were wrong. I typically enjoy being right ... but not today.

The drive home was gut-wrenching. The silence was so loud. I was sure both of the kids heard all the voices in my head. The battled dialogue going on inside of me had to be obviously heard. I finally decide to peek in the rear-view mirror.

There he is. Slumped over the armrest. I know he's tired from his overnight stay at his friend's house, but his body language screamed something different. I call his name only to see his dripping face look up at me with those huge, brown, puppy dog-eyes. It's more than I can handle. Only two miles from home, I pull the car over and climb to the back seat where I embrace this confused and hurting child. We cry together while he speaks, "I didn't expect this. Why, momma, why?"

We have some hard decisions to make concerning Adam's hearing. I know that God will give us the wisdom to make the best choice as well as the strength to follow through and the patience to deal with the situation at hand.

I know that. I truly believe it. "I still trust You, Lord." I uttered those words as I walked aimlessly around the house today.

While the exhausted young man sleeps away some of his tiredness and pain, I turn to the keyboard. Sometimes it is medicinal for me. Although my shirt is stained with the salt water leaking from my eyes, I feel the Lord's embrace around me. I had just begun to write when a dear friend called. Coincidence? No. Perfect timing from the Lord. I needed to cry some more so the Lord sent her.

As my devotion said today, "Life is hard, but God is good - all the time."

Thank you, Father, for seeing my hurt and caring.

My thankful journal will not be empty tonight...there is still plenty to write.And for that - I am thankful.

The "Steal" of the Year!

This is such an unbelievable story that you won't even think it is true! Trust me when I tell you that every word is true (since I'm not typically in the habit of lying on my blogs!!)

After drooling over all the beautiful suitcases that passed in front of her eyes over vacation, my daughter decided that she just had to have a more stylish means of transporting her goods!

She finally picked this adorable one from a little boutique called Dustees:She was excited beyond words but in complete shock when she got home and unzipped the suitcase. We could not believe our eyes as we pulled out this brand new dress inside! It is beautiful, but we didn't pay for it!Now, here is the kicker...where did the dress come from? It still has the $65 price tag on it so it certainly looks like we did a little bit of shop lifting! But alas, that is not possible. Why, you ask? I'll tell you!

Because Dustee's doesn't sell dresses!!!!!

I called the store to ask if they sell any clothing. She said they had a few tops and maybe one or two sundresses that they were just starting to carry but weren't even on the floor yet. It is mainly bags, purses, scarves and jewelry.

I explained to Victoria that we have to do the right thing (or at least attempt to) and try to take the dress back. After all, the lady on the phone could have been wrong. My daughter was quite saddened by this point since she thinks she just got a free dress!

We take it back the next day and I ask the lady if the dress came from this store. She tells me that she has never seen this dress before! She asks her manager who replies with the same answer and then ask the lady who just happens to be there from the corporate office - now I am definitely on the up-n-up! All three of them shake their heads saying that it is not a Dustee's dress. Then I explain what happened and how we found this dress in our purchased suitcase yesterday. The head boss says, "Well, I guess you have yourself a free dress!"

How exciting is that???

The best part? We did the right thing and still ended up with the dress :)

Of course, you must know that it fits both of us perfectly!!

I LOVE Gardening!

Remember my last blog about addictions?

Well, this is my newest one...gardening! So many of my friends have huge, flourishing vegetable gardens that would just make you green with envy (no pun intended!) After 5 years of begging, my hubby finally blessed me with three, nice sized raised garden beds. Since we're about 6 weeks late planting, I wasn't sure that anything would burst through the soil. Much to my surprise, we had tiny but hearty little sprouts after only a week! It is now a family ritual for us to take the short trek to the back yard after breakfast and scream with delight about what new plant has shown itself for the world to smile over! Since my mom and dad are reading this, I must say - I know that I hated a garden as a child, but it's SO different as an adult! I just must share our process so far...I just get a warm feeling all over every time I see my own pictures! Thanks for letting me feel like Laura Ingalls!

Since we're headed out for our vacation in the morning, this will be my last blog for two weeks.

Blessings to you all!